SO, political ramblings of the day:

So Cheney did have something to do with that "Flame girl" . . . Oh dear, I guess GW can't trust anyone in his administration, or maybe he just thinks that this is some big elaborate hoax, like The Game with Micheal Douglas, or any of the better short stories its based off of . . . like, your chief advisor is under investigation by a special attorney. Your strong arm in the house just had his booking photo taken, and it looks like Delay thinks hes in Disneyland, the country is by far more cozy with Nixon than it is with your VP, who might also be under investigation, your entire agenda is sinking into the mud of Louisiana, the war you wanted to wage is turning 2000 today, and your entire base hates you for nominating your next door neighbor/school boy crush to the Supreme Court, and the rest of the country is wondering just how stupid they had to be last november to be had by such a sad little broken delusional man . . .

But Surprise! It was all a joke! And the indictments go away, everyone loves you again! The senate confirms your prom date, the house makes it required to do business with Jack Abramoff in order to hold a leadership position, and promptly escorts Pelosi out of her comfy corner office, and both houses come together to pass a virtual orgy of your pet legislation! Social Security is now seniors paying money to the college republicans, Medicare is sold to Pfizer for $1.50 and a pack of peanuts; it's illegal to burn the flag! It's legal to burn gays! The plans for the Freedom Tower are scrapped, and a 1776 foot statue of Reagen started! All stores are now required to sell at least a few handguns to minors every day! Charlton Heston is given an army of steamy A & M coeds whose blood will rejuvinate his cracked and withered body! Strom Thurmond comes back from the grave just in order to piss on LBJ's, and meanwhile says his daughter is nothing more than a money grabbing, lying, crackhead slut! Its a republicans wet dream! Iraqis decide to suicide bomb tehran instead of the Green Zone, Afghanis say "Hey! We love women!" and promptly elect a majority-female parliament! With tax-cuts!

A kid trying dope for the first time is locked up for life! Ken Lay gets a Get Out of Jail Free card!

The Gulf Coast becomes a golden shoreline where no one but bright, happy, blond children frolick while their parents make phone calls to their brokers, screaming "Buy! Buy! Buy!"

Rudy Giuliani and Arnold Schwarzeneggar are discovered naked with Richard Simmons, and all the Moderates flock to the Grand Old Party, and its treasured values of ignorance, hatred, and Wealth-no-matter-what-you-have-to-do-to-get-it, and of course, that value you hold in the center of your heart, aye, in the center of each of your band of merry defilers hearts of hearts, Power-at-any-cost.


Oh happy day!

Except, ummmmmm, George?

There's a reason why the "Reality" based community doesn't take offense at the term . . .

Gay Jesus Army Vs. Straight Jesus Army

Issue 1, Chapter 1
In the year 2013, Fathe Seamus O'Mally, Jesuit, and head of the top secret Genetic Labs of the Vatican, cloned from pieces of the true cross two perfect Christ embryos. These embryo's were implanted in Martha Hollingsworth, an unsuspecting American woman on honeymoon with her husband Jack. The embryos took root, and for the most part, John and Luke grew up two totally normal boys. It wasn't until high school that Luke started to realize something was different about him. It wasn't until high school that the feud between Gay Jesus and Straight Jesus began.

The year is now 2043, and Detective Luke Hollingsworth is taking the tram downtown to check out the latest homocide to appear on his Sony Crimelogger. He wears a suit far too expensive for his detective's salary, and Donna Summers is raging in his iEars. It was supposed to be a typical late night mugging gone wrong, no ID, no identifying electronics on the body whatsoever. It was supposed to be a typical night in the life of a gay detective. But the events that transpired would turn the affable, well dressed policeman into Gay Jesus.

to be continued . . .